This is my notes on the presentation by Ven. Master Guo Jun at 7th Global Conference on Buddhism, 10th December 2011.
CONFLICTS
How to solve conflicts in life?
- be optimistic? not to be pessimistic
- be objective? not to be subjective
- be rational? not to be emotional
The practice of middle path is to go beyond subjective and objective because objectivity is made of many subjective parts. Ven. Master Guo Jun gave an example about travelling on the plane. When it was stuffy on a plane and the passengers needed more air, they wanted to open the plane door. Although the passengers thought that they were objective in coming into conclusion to open the door, it was actually a collective of subjective opinions. When the pilot did not agree, one against many, the pilot was seen to have a subjective opinion. The solution is not to be objective or subjective, but to be realistic.
Extreme Middle Path Extreme
Subjective Realistic Objective
Realistic is to go beyond appearances, to look at dependent origination and to look at cause and effect. The practice of the middle path is to go beyond dualities. The Platform Sutra mentions 36 pairs of dualities. There is actually no definite meaning in reality. For example, if your height is 170cm. Is it tall or short? Tall or short compared to whom?
In the core of all disputes, conflicts and disagreements, there is an attitude of “You are wrong. I am right.” People are attached to thinking that they are right.
There are two types of conflicts:
- within the self, for example about what to choose, what to do. This type of conflict usually arises because of lack of wisdom.
- between self and environment/people. This type of conflict usually arises because of lack of compassion.
Problems arise because we tend to have a lot of compassion when it comes to our own faults, to have a lot of wisdom in seeing other people’s faults.
Extreme Middle Path Extreme
Rational Compassion Feeling
Logic Wisdom Emotion
Being realistic = wisdom + compassion
Being realistic starts with the relaxation of the body and mind.
Relaxation creates calm, clarity, understanding and compassion. It is like the surface of a pond, when the surface is calm then it reflects what is outside, too see something as it is. When the water of the pond becomes calm, impurities start to settle and you can see inside the pond clearly.
Understanding comes from deep listening that results in an open mind (wisdom) and an open heart (compassion). Misunderstanding is often caused by not listening, resulting in conflicts.
The session ended with 10-minute meditation accompanied with music.
May all beings be happy
Learn and Grow!
Inge Santoso, B. Com
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